Duke: “I can’t wait for this picture thing to start moving, Hank. I’ve been tickled a little since you’ve told me about it.”
Hank: “Quiet you buffoon, or else we will miss the opening credits. We don’t want to be the ones interrupting the mass population down below.”
“What’s below?”
“Squires, people and families of related people.”
“I don’t see nothing except blackness, Hank. Why’s that?”
“Because the light ran off once it knew you were an idiot. Now, keep your tongue still or so help me.”
“What’s there to help with, how many acorns do we have to wrangle?”
“About fifteen dozen if you were wondering. Now, silence is to be your name for a movie is unfolding before our very eyes. It has been one of great hype and expectation.”
“I thought I was Duke or something. Are you sure this is the right phlegm, Hank?”
“Of course this is the right film, peasant brother, for it involves a walking bat impeccably dressed in cow leather. The other even went out of his way to fashion an extraterrestrial face. He is rather scary, isn’t he?”
“He’s funny actually, Hank. I’d pet him. Don’t know why you had to put him down like that.”
“He seems a bit preoccupied at the moment, dear brother.”
“But I want to pet him, really.”
“Then make like a bird and fly your way through that silver contraption we have the honor of being in front of.”
“We’re actually below it, even though I see it straight ahead.”
“That must mean we are diameters from it, Duke.”
“What’s a dime?”
“Can you just keep quiet so we can watch this disaster of a flick.”
“I don’t like bats though, Hank, so I pretty much won’t like anything. Bats are flying rodents with flappers attached if you wanted to know.”
“Why on earth are they on a swing? There is supposed to be blood and mass chaos.”
“I like their blend of Film noir myself. Look, kitty came back; she’s taking a water break in a bath tub or something.”
“That is just an actor portraying a cat for film’s sake.”
“Who has a stomach ache? I like ribs too. Pick me for the next housing waitress, Mr. crooked nose bat. Remember that one time we got stuck in that rock opening and the bat-something flew in? You were so scared its delicious.”
“I never show fear.”
“Baloney, Hank. What a load of malarkey, Archie.”
“Blubbering fool, you’ve made us miss the entire première.”
“It’s okay, sourpuss, we can have it packaged to us. How come kitty was in there, Hank? I told you kitty was something to someone. Boy, did that part throw me off.”
“I am curious about what circulates through your head.”
“Is my head really a circus, Hank? Dinosaurs cross my mind every so often since you wanted to know. I like the S shape the Brontosaurus makes with its neck. Hank, how come kitty was in the picture and why was water covering? I’m blown away. I give that picture eight gold stars out of seven.”
“For the first time ever, my reply will not form. What we just saw is often called a scam in its truest form. This on-screen play did not feature the celebrities of today, for it was a second-rate knock off and nothing more.”
“You’re the shade of a red flower now, Hank. I have my doubts this was what you said this was.”
“Believe you me the real production is quite marvelous, even though it revolves around pesky rodents and supernatural forces of which have left their mark on society. Now, let us leave this ragged disease and focus our efforts on finding a way home.”
“Who do I put my trust in, Hank, since you said you’re not my go-to something. By the way, what’s an anchor? You said that kitty was traded by an anchor or something, so what is it?”
“I said the cat was portrayed by an actor which is another term for celebrity.”
“I dislike celery very much now.”
“Now I suppose we must cover that before finding a way home.”
“We should call ourselves ‘don’t know where we are nincompoop’.”
“By god, you are an idiot. Let us get down from this beam so we can discuss the matter at hand.”
Tags: alfred, Anne Hathaway, Bane, batman, BFF, bruce wayne, Catwoman, Christian Bale, Christopher Nolan, commentary, creative writing, DC Comics, duke, fiction, film, Gotham City, hank, humor, lucius fox, morgan freeman, movie theatres, MST3K, parody, squirrels, the dark knight rises, Tom Hardy, trilogy, wayne enterprises, youtube
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This account has been active for about a year give or take. Blogging is quite easy, as is the quick works of fiction. Thoughts precede thoughts in unison, in rhyme that is really all. Hoping you return soon, friend.
J.R. Leyvas 04.09.2012
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